Gender Differentiated Hair Removal?

I was shopping at Target today to pick up a few last minute things for my Vegas trip (I know that you will all miss me more than a puppy with an anxiety disorder misses its owner when I am gone, try to hang in there- it is only four days). As I strolled along, I observed that the aisles containing deodorant and razors and other things of that nature are separated into two aisles based on gender. Lady Speedstick does not reside alongside her masculine counterpart, and a razor for a lady is found nowhere near those for men. I really do not think it was always this way- in the past, men and women had to shop for their hair removal and sweat stopping needs in the same place, and endure those awkward stares from each other. I believe that this change was made mainly for the benefit of the ladies- I mean, imagine if men found out that they sweat! The whole balance of heterosexual relationships which already hangs percariously by a thread would be thrown into utter anarchy!

Good thing Target had the decency to continue fooling men into thinking that women are naturally hair-free and do not spend hours plucking, tweezing, waxing, shaving, and other equally painful home treatments to continue the ruse. Then again, I guess there is a bit of embarrassment associated with a man buying wax. Actually, since I have been strategically banned from the man hair-removal aisle by Target's clever setup, I have no idea if men do wax anything, and will never really be able to find out lest I risk an awkward trip down an aisle in which I would clearly have no business whatsoever. I guess there was that one commercial for I cannot recall which product where there are two college-aged guys in a bathroom and one is waxing the other one's back. So unless the advertising industry is lying to me, I guess that happens on occasion.

Now it is only a matter of time before the Intuition razors start picketing in protest that they want equality between them and the Gilettes for men. Targets nationwide will have to shut down for weeks- imagine the chaos! Just give the Intuition what it wants and put it next to the Gilette!


What is this lady doing??

The Eiffel Tower Will, Like, Totally Alter Your Reality

That is, according to the random Boulder hippie seated at the table next to me while I ate lunch at Noodles. His informing me of this was provoked when he saw my messenger bag depicting the London underground map. Our dialogue went something like this:

Hippie: (pointing at my bag) Woah, what city is that?
Me: London
Hippie: Cool! You been there then?
Me: Yes, it was lovely
Hippie: That's so weird, cuz Paris has one of those too!
Me: You mean.. a metro?
Hippie: Yeah!
Me: That's cool... I think most big cities have one of those though.
Hippie: Have you ever been to Paris?
Me: Yeah, it's great there
Hippie: Dude, tell me you climbed up the Eiffel tower!
Me: Well, my friend and I climbed up most of it, but we didn't want to pay to take the elevator all the way up.
Hippie: (looking completely dumbstruck) Oh man... you totally missed out!! I mean seriously, the top was soooo different from the level down! You could see like, ALL of Paris
Me: Well, we were still pretty impressed, but maybe next time I will go to the top...
Hippie: NO, I mean , you have NO clue how much you missed out on! It like, altered my entire reality and perspective on life!
Me: Well... I guess I will just have to go on with my reality as it is.
And then he asked me what my name was, and I told him, and he said it was nice chatting, and then left. Well, at least these charming encounters that are oh-so-typical of Boulder make for somewhat entertaining stories later. And if I am wrong, and you are not entertained, then too bad, at least this was a short entry.


7/8 of the way up: boring
The tippy top: reality altering

Who knew?

Not Impressed by The Hunger Games

Basically any movie based on any book is going to be somewhat of a slap in the face to the devoted book lovers. Now, the degree of pain which the slap inflicts upon these book-lovers varies by how true the film remains to the story. I was expecting The Hunger Games to be as accurate as modern day pregnancy tests from what I read of critics' reviews. I find this true on some levels, but some rather important aspects of the plot were altered far too much to be acceptable. Yes, I understand time limitations. However, I do not understand when inaccuracies are made that seem entirely unnecessary- something which happened far too often in this film.

I believe that before I even began reading the series, I knew that Jennifer Lawrence was cast as Katniss. Therefore, it was not a kick in the stomach when I saw her in the leading role, and I think there is no one else who could have played it more accurately. Ever since I saw Lawrence in Winter's Bone I was aware of her capabilities on screen. The fact that at her age she has already recieved an Oscar nod for best actress is fine evidence for this as well. So, I had no problem with her in the role of Katniss- she did an astounding job. The similarities between book characters and film characters pretty much end there, however.

The worst offender I believe was Donald Sutherland as President Snow. Author of The Hunger Games Suzanne Collins specifically makes him out to be a creepy guy with "puffy blue lips" (the kind which would insinuate multiple plastic surgeries). He is supposed to be a typical, overly made-up citizen of the Capitol, and yet to me he simply appears to be a kind old grandfather, the type of character which we see in Pride and Predjudice. Also on my list of horrendously-cast actors is Josh Hutcherson as Peeta. This may have been a product of my imagination, but I had invisioned him to be a manly, somewhat spastic, charming young man who clearly wins some of Katniss' affection. Their romance is a key plot point in the novel, and yet it was not well done in any way in the film. Hutcherson is a small individual and appears to be about 3 years younger than Lawrence- it is like DiCaprio and Winslet all over again in Titanic. This simply does not work, and they have some of the worst on-screen chemistry I have ever seen. The poorly-done romance between the two had a seriously negative impact on the film as a whole.

On a more positive note, the explanations of things that non-readers would not understand was generally exceptional. Fitting so many plots into the film is an extremely difficult task, and one that was done very well. The cinematography was also an aspect which positively contributed to the film, and it also did not feel too long or too short. So, I do not want to bully the film too much as I understand the difficulties faced by the filmmakers. Is it worth seeing? Yes, but do not be too disappointed by the discrepencies between cinema and literature.

These two? Seriously? He could be her little brother.

My Dream Dinner Guest

Remember in elementary school when your teacher asked which historical figure you would invite to dinner if you were able to do so? I think that I always had a rough time with that question and due to the nervousness it instilled within me, I would answer something generic like a former president or Oprah. However, I can now say with complete confidence that my dinner guest of choice for whom I would spend hours cooking and then selecting a perfect wine to compliment the dish would be Oscar Wilde. With a dinner guest like that, you would be guaranteed a good meal with plenty of laughs and a conversation incapable of lagging.

The Importance of Being Earnest is one of Wilde's repertoire of great works, oozing with the kind of humour that sneaks its way into your mind and embeds itself there. It is clever humour, irony, satire... the real stuff. None of the slapstick, cheap laughs that are far too common in today's culture. This is what defines comedy in my opinion, the kind that actually makes you think while you laugh and pokes fun at flaws in society and peoples' characters and not things like bodily functions.

The actors in the roles of this play performed with passion, and in all honesty I have no idea how they did not crack themselves up on stage. They were all brutally funny in their every move and vocalizations of Wilde's witty dialogue. The entire plot is so full of twists and turns that you almost need a roadmap, and the end is so meticulously perfect that you can't help but feel completely satisfied in the way you would after downing your favorite meal. I would recommend that everyone go to see this play, but I believe it was a one night only affair. So, I guess I could recommend reading the book instead!

Raccoons, Squirrels and Pigeons, Oh MY!

Monday was my first day as a volunteer at the Greenwood Wildlife animal rehibilitaion center. A couple of weeks ago, my friend Liz and I coincidentally both ended up going to the volunteer orientation at the same place, and therefore decided that we would do the same shift and carpool each week. Aside from being warned at the orientation multiple times about how gross (for lack of a more eloquent term) wild animals can be, I still somehow thought that I would not be phased when I actually began volunteering there. As you will see in the upcoming paragraphs I was in for a lovely treat...(that is sarcasm, for all of you who have trouble detecting it in text form).

In one day, I was peed on in addition to touching blankets soaked with pee from three different species, was attacked by pigeons, hissed at by raccoons, growled at by foxes and fed animals a better diet than most people eat. Don't get me wrong, I was not deterred forever from that place and still feel it's worthwhile work, but I just wish that the darn animals would appreciate what us potentially insane volunteers do for them. Upon our arrival, Liz and I spent some time filling out some paperwork, got our name tags, and then were instantly introduced to the world of wildlife rehibilitaion that made my stomach tie itself in knots multiple times. We were first led into the baby squirrel room; a cute room in which some very non-cute things occur. We were first warned about all the ways that one wrong move on our part when it comes to feeding them, like holding the syringe in the wrong position, would instantly kill them. No pressure. Then we were told about how since we were new, we could help to "stem" the babies. My mind could not even try to wrap itself around the term, and sparing you from the details of the procedure which basically covers your hands in baby squirrel pee, I will just say that it has to do with getting them to um...do their business into the garbage. Gross.

Liz and I were then separated and I went with a different employee to clean bird cages because I wrongly assumed that it would result in my being less covered by animal waste. Why I thought that, in retrospect, makes no sense to me. However, the worst part about the bird room was not the removal of the soaked paper towels from their cages but the reactions of the pigeons and doves as a strange arm invaded their space to do so. I was pecked at incessantly and these birds made noises that I did not know that lovely things like doves were capable of making. When I asked the lady showing me the ropes if it was really such a good idea that I clean their cages while they were still in them as one essentially was digging his beak into my flesh, she flashed me a smile and said "eh, it doesn't hurt that bad". I assure you, it did. Maybe she was used to it at that point in her bird healing career.

After cleaning the cages of say, 8 or 9 angry birds (much angrier than the ones in the popular smart phone game), I fed the bunnies and the muskrat who were thankfully not in attack mode which was extremely welcome after the morning that I had had. When Liz and I were reunited, we got to watch a raccoon with a rather Hulk-esque temper be given fluids because of his dehydrated state. I have never been so afraid to be in the same room with another creature, and had issues placing my trust in the handler who did not seem to be a match for the raccoon's rage. It almost matched that of the ire in the eyes of the fox who we fed later on that day.

Well, at least the animals are cute.
You have no idea what this guy is capable of...

The Drowsy Chaperone: This Musical Delivers!

I just did a quick brain-rack to see if I could pull a dusty memory out of my mental attic of a time when I laughed so hard during a musical. Though it was a quick skimming of my memories and not a cerebral spring cleaning, I doubt that any more time would have come up with any instance. The Drowsy Chaperone, currently on the main stage at Boulder's Dinner Theater, was witty, creative, and all-around entertaining.

It calls itself a "musical within a comedy" which makes sense in that it is a play within a play, but I think a more appropirate description would be a comedy within a comedy, as both plot lines were gut-bustingly hilarious. Many of the jokes bordered on offensive, but in a way that did not cross the line, and therefore worked wonderously. I mean, who doesn't love a good joke about Mormons? Or about cocaine in toothpaste? I guess you have to see it for that second one to make sense. The way that the story is structured is comedic in itself as well- the story is told from the mouth of a middle-aged man telling us about the musical The Drowsy Chaperone and he is occasionally interrupted by things like his phone ringing or the power going out. This method allows for constant creative humor and gives the audience something refreshingly different than what they expect from a theater experience.

The characters were vivid and charming thanks to a stunning cast composed primarily of Boulder Dinner Theater regulars. Among the many players contributing to the story are gangsters posing as pastry chefs, a melodramatic and alcoholic chaperone, a dumb blonde, and Adolpho. Never before has a character in a musical been so fantastically portrayed in my eyes as Adolpho, the stereotypical European womanizer who is instructed to seduce the female lead and prevent her wedding. Seth Caikowski got the character down pat, using a thick accent and clumsy movements that truly emphasized this hilarous role. My favorite scene hands-down was Adolpho's number with the drowsy chaperone. I would see it again just to watch that scene.

Though majorly unheard of, this musical is sure to please everyone as it is engaging and fun, not too long, and with lighthearted and catchy tunes. Bring your friends and your family, as long as they are old enough to hear jokes about cocaine and pornography- I promise that this musical will not disappoint!

His Mom Works, His Brother is the Guy from The Hangover...

...and Jeff lives at home. His mother's basement, more specifically, where he spends days on end smoking pot which likely leads to his repeated viewing and over-analysis of the movie Signs. Jeff is convinced that there are no coincidences-for example, that there is no such thing as a "wrong number". For this reason, he is sent on a fate-induced journey after recieving what you and I would consider a phone call to the incorrect recipient, and we go right alongside him to discover his destiny.

Throughout the tapestry of the plot, subplots pertaining to the lives of Jeff's mother (Susan Sarandon) and brother Pat (Ed Helms) are interwoven to add complexity to the story. Pat's character, in my opinion, adds a nice touch of humor to the plot because Ed Helms can't help but be hilarious. I mean, whose favorite character on The Office isn't Andy? In Jeff, his character Pat is struggling to save his seemingly doomed marriage with the help of his brother. As for their widowed mother, she is taken aback when she discovers she has a secret admirer in the office. And, as is expected of any story, these subplots all tie together in the end with one major event. I won't give anything away, because that would just be rude on my part, and I like to think that I have basic movie-review manners (though I am not sure that those have been officially defined).

This movie was okay, but not as good as I was hoping. The trailer made it seem like it was going to be a lot more fulfilling of a story and give me some sort of new perspective on humanity, but in reality it resolves on a rather simple note. For some reason, it just seemed to lack something that I cannot really place my finger on. Maybe I will recieve a sign from destiny telling me what it is.

Brasserie Ten Ten- Feels More French than Paris

Though to be fair, most people say that Paris ought to be classified as a country all on its own. Although my curse with slow service was not broken, the food was fantastic and this downfall just added to the European atmosphere. The waiter had a strong accent; yet another addition to the overall French-ness of the place. Either he was authentically from France or Canada, or just a really good at faking it. He had me fooled, if that was the case.

This little restaurant is nestled on Pearl Street in Boulder right across from the Med. These two restaurants have a similar vibe; a result, perhaps, from their shared ownership or their serving of European cuisine. Brasserie Ten Ten has a fabulously-priced happy hour which offers mouth watering cocktails and tasty bites at irresistible prices. Who can pass up a plate of two ham and cheese or vegetarian crepes for 3 dollars? No one at our table, that's for sure! The vegetarian crepes containing artichoke hearts, cream cheese, arugula, paprika and basil oil were just big enough to whet one's palate and leave you craving more. For those of you who can't refuse a little something from the sea, the anchovies and shrimp cocktail are sure to please, and be sure to treat your inner Zorba the Greek with their olive tapenade.

Wow, this is starting to sound like an obnoxious commercial...

Because there were four of us, it took a few more of these little plates to satisfy our tummies, so we also shared the french fries with truffle aioli, the jambon serrano (to satisfy my father's inner Spaniard) and the cauliflower. Since it was my birthday, I ordered a dessert, and selected some sort of pistachio cake with a scoop of ice cream and drizzled with warm caramel sauce. However, the fact that it was Lent and I gave up dessert cancelled out my ability to eat it, so I had to sit with my hands folded in my lap as my table mates consumed it on my behalf, overtaken with sounds of pleasure and comments comparing the dessert to the "best thing they had ever eaten". I guess I will never know...

Anonymous- Offensive to an Endless List of Historical Figures

If Shakespeare were alive today, he would be tearing out his hair in tufts while simultaneously stomping the ground like a child having a tantrum over the cookie withheld from him if he witnessed the sheer offense that is the movie Anonymous. On that same note, so would Queen Elizabeth and basically everyone else who was a character in this painful film. Hard to follow, drawn out and longer than it ever needed to be, this movie slaps history in the face and does not even feel the slightest bit of remorse.

First of all, whether you believe that Shakespeare's hand or that of another wrote his famous works, it seems just wrong and disrespectful to portray him as a drunkard constantly in the company of hookers. So many historical inaccuracies should be illegal, like that Queen Elizabeth had a random affair with the Earl of Oxford, the alleged "real" author of all of Shakespeare's plays; an affair for which there is not even a shred of evidence. Apparently, writer John Orloff is well aware of these discrepencies, and included them intentionally to pay homage to "the way that Shakespeare took liberties with historical facts in his plays". That seems like a bit of a stretch...

Anyways, the plot is basically a twist of how the Earl of Oxford, Edward De Vere, wrote so many marvelous plays and then needed a face to cover for him lest he face persecution for being involved in the forbidden world of theater. This plotline is laced with flashbacks to him as a young man (played by a rather dreadful actor- no offense to him really, maybe it was just the dialogue that could not be helped? I'm not sure...) getting it on with Queen Elizabeth despite the fact that he is already married. There is no prologue or any sort of clear explanation as to who is who in the begininng, so it actually got to the point where my friend and I had to look up the characters on the internet as we watched. Not a good sign.

My Hunger is Satisfied

I already miss Peeta, Katniss, Finnick and, yes, even Gale, my dear friends from the Hunger Games trilogy that kept me company for an embarrassingly short amount of time. It is embarrassing because it must say something about how much free time I have that I can down three novels of about 400 pages each in about ten days. A little pathetic, yes, but also lends major props to the author, Suzanne Collins, for making me hoplessly addicted to her words.

People told me a number of things about Mockingjay, the final book in the trilogy, before I even cracked the lovely baby blue cover. They were almost all about how the story concludes and how it would make me feel, and all were generally along the same lines. I heard that the end would make me "regret having read the series at all", and that it would make me want to "throw myself in front of a train". My mind was swarming with possibilities after hearing these comments- possibilities ranging from deaths of characters to Katniss waking up and having it all be a dream. That would just be cruel. I wish I could actually discuss my thoughts on the end, but I will not ruin it for anyone because I think that it is worth reading. The end was, yes, shocking, but perfect to me. It was wonderfully ironic and ignited my mind like a literary match (if that makes any sense).

I can give a brief summary, however, without ruining the oh-so-offensive ending (but do NOT read this if you have not read books one and two and plan to. I don't want to start any riots involving torches and pitchforks [or any riots in general]). We start off where the second novel left off (logical, right?), where Katniss has just discovered that her dear home of District 12 has been destroyed by the Capitol. Evil, right? Not only that, but they have kidnapped Peeta! Oh dear! Whatever will Katniss do? Probably just deal with it and latch back onto Gale like she usually does. Anyways, there is now a full-on war between the Rebels and the Capitol, and the rebels have set up a base in District 13, which no one thought existed before. That is the premise as rapidly as I can summarize it. Like Catching Fire, it takes a little while for the pace to quicken, but once it does, you will spend the wee hours of the night poring over words until your brain cannot take it and you are no longer able to shut out it out while it begs in desperation for you to go to bed. Something to look forward to, right? And if you have read it... you know exactly what I mean.

Some Highschool Kids you Don't Want to Mess With

These are the main characters of Chronicle. Well, at least one of them is, after getting far too carried away with his newfound superhero-esque powers. This film's bizarrely unique story is what makes it succssful. Most of it is seen from the point of view of Andrew, one of the three teenage protagonists, who has decided that he wants to begin filming his entire life. Through his lens, we see the abuse he renders from his father, his mother dying slowly in her bed at home (from what we presume is cancer), the bullies who make his highschool existence more painful than normal- basically, whatever Andrew sees, we see.

Sounds like a painful, run-of-the-mill teen flick, but it is so much more than that. The twist that leads it away from being something you would expect to find on the Disney channel comes relatively quickly in the film. Andrew, his cousin and their friend are at a rave in an abandoned house and somehow come across a strange cave. Of course, they decide to enter it (because if they didn't we wouldn't have any plot, would we?) despite the fact that in reality no one in their right mind would enter an abandoned cave with creepy sounds eminating from it. That is beside the point. They enter it, encounter come alien-esque glowy thing, and the next thing we know the camera cuts out and the next scene is the three boys utilizing their newfound powers.

I don't want to give away too much more, because then you would all feel little to no need to go see it, and I do not want to do that to the poor, sad movie theaters. The preview tells you all of this anyway, and also goes on to indicate that Andrew gets carried away and begins to abuse his powers (he apparently did not have an uncle to tell him that "with great power comes great responsibility" like Peter Parker did). Whoever played Andrew is going to go far in the film industry because he was an exact replica of Leonardo DiCaprio. Seriously, see image below, and tell me if I am wrong. To summarize, see this movie, but be aware that it gets a little bloody...

There Should Not be Songs in the Lorax...

The majority of musical numbers in Dr. Seuss' The Lorax were "slightly" painful. Not quite root canal painful, but certainlly having your teeth cleaned painful. The lyrics were childish but not creative; whoever wrote them figured that if the lines rhymed it would be acceptable in a kid's movie. That did not really work for me.

Aside from the uninspired music, I enjoyed The Lorax (which, mind you, I did not pay extra for a headache and see in 3D) despite all of the negativity from critics. The casting was perfect- in all honesty, could anyone but Danny DeVito do the voice of the Lorax? Probably not, nor could anyone but Betty White play the quirky grandmother. All of the voices were spot on, as well as the animation. The evil business man who was ruining the world by selling bottled air and keeping citizens blind to the fact that they need trees was one of the creepiest little computer generated things I had ever seen. His hair was like a Beatle's cut gone horribly wrong and his squished little face was the stuff of nightmares. You will know exactly what I mean when you see him.

The Lorax itself made surprisingly few appearances in the film, and I am not sure why. I have to admit that as a child that was not one of my go-to bedtime stories, but I had still imagined that the Lorax would have shown up more in a film named after it. I was also confused about how it was an all-magical being that did not seem to have any power in stopping the cutting down of all the trees except with his words. I suppose that is to send a message that we have to see the mistakes we are making and correct them ourselves to make a difference? Probably.

Anyways, I thought it was an enjoyable film- nice and short and good to look at. Just try not to cringe too much during the songs.

Centro Latin Kitchen & Refreshment Palace: Very Convincing...

The fancy names for their dishes created from hard-to-pronounce foods that are sometimes in Spanish and sometimes in English and the fact that they call themselves a "refreshment palace" (what does that mean, exactly? Who rules in a refreshment palace? King Mojito?) are among the various reasons that Centro seems a lot better than it actually is. The second I walked into this west Pearl Street restaurant, I felt a snooty, hipster-esque vibe resonating throughout it's modern Latin orange (just watch that be a new paint color name) walls. The entire place seems to have an attitude which makes you feel like you should be dining alongside political activists, film makers with thick-rimmed glasses or someone like Andy Warhol. I am not sure if any of this makes sense- eat there, and it will.

Now, they always say that confidence has perks- the fact that Centro is very sure of itself almost makes the food taste better than it really is. For example, instead of calling a slighyly modified tortilla soup "tortilla soup", they call it Sopa Azteca and then do that thing that upscale restaurants do where instead of giving a full description of the food they just list the fanciest sounding ingredients. Basically, the tortilla soup is showing its confidence by saying: "tortilla soup?? Heck no, I'm SOPA AZTECA baby!" and therefore convincing us that it is cooler than it is. That is a soup with swagger. It was actually very good- probably the best part of the meal. For our entree, my friend and I split the el hombre burrito with chorizo, wild mushrooms, and shrimp smothered in pork green chile. It was good, but once again, when what is basically a chorizo burrito calls itself something like that, it really convinces you that it is going to be the best thing ever created. Though it was good, I am not ready to devote any shrines to it.

I guess that fact that they are a "refreshment palace" as well as a Latin kitchen means that they basically rule at making drinks (because if they don't, they get downgraded to a refreshment shack. And no one wants that). Our very sweet waitress made me a tasty pomegranate mojito, and it was one of the best drinks that has ever graced my mouth with its presence. The service was a little slow, but it was seemingly the hot spot of the universe when we got there and our waitress was a regular Mary Poppins attitude-wise. She did this thing that I really liked where when she talked to us she would get down to our level phsically and look us in the eye like she truly cared. She got a good tip.

Having a Kid with Your Best Friend??

Sounds like a reality TV show! Or, a romantic(ish) comedy. Friends with Kids happens to be the latter, and rather successful as such. I feel like my constant entering of theaters with low expectations has been working to my advantage. I had heard rather minimal amounts about this movie so was not really planning on seeing it right away- I guess Adam Scott's appearance on the Rachel Ray show this morning to promote the film worked, since I went to see it a few hours later.

The "friends with benefits" horse has been dead and beaten so many times that no one wants to see the bloody equine mess, especially not those involved in PETA. So, I am happy that this film decided to go a different direction- two best friends who decide they want to avoid the complications that arise from being married with kids (since all of their friends' marriages become void of any romance post-pregnancy) and therefore decide to *ahem* get it on once, have a kid, and split the responsibilities in raising it while staying strictly plutonic. Of couse, as any audience used to Hollywood films knows, there will be complications. Like, Megan Fox. I do not even know if I need to say more about that.

It certainly was amusing- I mean, I can see no other outcome when you put Kristin Wiig, Maya Rudolph, John Hamm and other gut-bustingly hilarous actors in the same flick. I have to say, I was impressed with Adam Scott as well. I have not seen him in much, though I learned today that he is on the TV show Parks and Recreation, but I thought he did a great job and gave his all to the role. They also chose a cheek-pinchingly adorable kid to play their son, and that is coming from someone who essentially never gets all mushy, cutesy-wootsy over kiddie widdies.

There is not really much else I feel the need to say about this movie- it was heartfelt, honest, hilarous, and entertaining for its entire duration. There were some awkwardly graphic parts that I was not expecting, but now you can consider yourself warned and not go with your parents/grandparents/kids/awkward friends.

Also- I do not think this poster makes much sense. If you pick "love" and "kids" doesn't that sort of equal happiness? I'm not sure what mathematician worked out this equation.

Gale or Peeta? OMG, Katniss Can't Decide!

That essentially sums up the first half of the second book in the Hunger Games trilogy, Catching Fire. I was blown away at how much worse it seemed in comparison to the intriguing first book, and how little I cared about the new problems of the main character, Katniss. It seems oh-so-reminiscent of Twilight as she goes from fighting to survive to debating with herself which guy she prefers more. Even more obnoxious is the rate at which she changes her mind. One paragraph, she is oozing on and on about how much she loves Gale, and the next she is making out with Peeta and it just, like, totally feels right! It also seems rather unrealistic that they both just put up with her leading them on like that and seemed completely fine with her being flaky.

As I read this, I kept wondering what this series had come to. The first one was so intense and had me hooked from start to finish. I almost gave up reading the second one. However, my advice is to plug through the teen drama crap because it does get a lot better. Another aspect which was hard to overcome at first was that the author was constantly recapping things that happened in the first book for anyone who hadn't read it, which I guess makes sense, but it was pretty obnoxious to read a two-page explanation that anyone who read the first book would easily understand.

So, if you are ever going to read the series, do not read this next part becuase A) it would not make sense unless you read the first one, and B) it is basically a plot summary of book 2.

Essentially, the book begins where the last one ends, where Peeta and Katniss are back in District 12 and about to go on their victory tour. Things have changed, however; they live in the ritzy area of town and are pampered whereas they verged on starvation pre-Hunger Games. Katniss is trying to figure out her emotions (give me a break) once she sees her old flame Gale, but still wants Peeta because she is a teenage girl and they are more confusing than one of those 5x5 Rubics cubes (can anyone solve those?). So, she is doing annoying things like going back and forth telling them that she wants them to run away with her, and then changing her mind again. Then, she gets a visit from the evil President Snow who advises her that her actions in the Hunger Games are potentially causing residents of other districs to rebel, and also he does not believe that she actually loves Peeta. Blah blah, so she has to try harder to convince him that she loves Peeta. After that, a bunch of little things happen that convince the people of Panem to want to rebel against the Capitol, and then there is another Hunger Games where crazy, futuristic stuff happens which makes me glad to live on Earth in 2012.

Murphy's: You Don't Have to be Irish to Dine There!

Although, I really would not consider the food at Murphy's to be Irish cuisine. The way their menu is set up oozes creativity with subcategories such as "comfort food" which includes things like fish and chips and turkey with mashed potatoes and gravy, and then their "signature entrees" which has more exotic meals like coconut Thai curry. The wall is decked out with art from various parts of the world and witty signs which chortle little jokes like "you can't fall off the floor". The atmosphere is enjoyable- the lights are dim but not to the point where you can't see the person sitting across from you, and it bustles with conversation but not to the point where you feel the need to scream at your immediate neighbor.

The food was decent and reasonably priced, but I can't say it was anything mind blowing or spectacular. I got the BBQ salmon with pesto and red pepper sauce which came with mashed sweet potatoes and grilled squash. The salmon was fantastic- the combination of BBQ, pesto and peppers was pure genius. However, the mashed sweet potatoes were just that- mashed sweet potatoes. They lacked any sort of seasoning (I would have added a dash of cinnamon perhaps?) so were slightly uninspired. The same was the case for the squash- it really could have used a bit of a zip. I was pleased overall though, but once again was cursed with below average service as far as speed goes. Maybe I just have high expectations as to how quickly I should be served?

What Airline does Kirsten Dunst work for?

I was watching Elizabethtown today and I could not help noticing her flight attendant schedule that seems rather unrealistic, seeing as how I have now been to an interview for that position. I think it is common knowledge that having an ideal schedule as a flight attendant means paying a lot of dues when you first start out. Things like being on-call for 6 days straight, working holidays and weekends, and being on a plane for as long as 12 hours at a time. So, as I was watching this film, I felt it was pretty far-fetched that the Kirsten Dunst character, Claire (or Clare? Whatever) was basically making her whole schedule for herself. What's that Orlando Bloom? You are in Kentucky? Be right there! And then she somehow manages to be free to randomly hang out with him whenever she wants, and go to his dad's funeral, and then magically meet him at the end of his road trip.

Another thing that rubs me the wrong way about the plot of this film is the end when Orlando drives home instead of flies per Kirsten's request. She makes him this elaborate book and some music to accompany his drive, and somehow times all of it perfectly so that she is waiting for him at the exact moment when he gets to a certain spot on the trip. What if he did not follow her schedule to a T? What if he decided that he really liked one town and wanted to stay longer? Then she would have been totally screwed and ended up waiting around and either feeling like an idiot or feeling like she got ditched, or both.

Zolo Grill- A Flavor Sensation!

Mis gustativas nunca habían sido tan alegres. For all of you non-Spanish speakers out there, use Google translate. Despite my many years of inhabiting Boulder, I am still completely ignorant when it comes to the restaurants that this city has to offer. I am very glad that my friend dragged me out of my culinary bubble and suggested that we dine at the Zolo Grill located at 28th and Arapahoe. This decadant restaurant puts a modern spin on Mexican food and combines flavor sensations with results that would please even the most stubborn gourmand. And by that I mean, the food critic from the movie Ratatouille would be over the moon by this food. High praise, I know. I know you are all dying to know what it was I ate that sent my senses soaring. It was happy hour, so I began the evening with a red sangria, completely reasonably priced at $3.50. I will admit, the only negative about this restaurant were the prices. Most things were reasonable, especially the happy hour selection with tasty little bites to tide you over and drinks that can be dubbed liquid happiness, but the entrees ebbed on the side of making a college student cry. That is, about a range of $15-$23 per entree.

The sangria was, as I said, liquid happiness- not overly sweet like some sangrias, and the perfect amount of kick. My dining pal ordered a strawberry margarita which was also amazing- I could barely taste the tequila- which is a good thing for me. So many bad experiences have led me to be unable to drink anything containing the stuff, even if it is almost completely disguised. We also shared some chips and salsa, which unfortunately were not gratis (I hope you still have Google translate open), but very tasty- some of the best restaurant salsa I have had.

Now for the piece-de-resistance (there should be an accent in there somewhere... feeling lazy)- my entree. I went with the winter squash tamales with cauliflower puree, dried cranberries churney, and crispy brussels sprouts. Whoever decided to combine those flavors should get some kind of award for being a culinary genius. This food was amazing- I wanted to chow the whole thing down in 5 seconds. My friend got the Zolo Market salad and was raving about it as well. Aside from the food which should provide reason enough to eat here, the decor and ambiance were perfect as well. Our service was a tad on the lagging side, but it was extremely busy and they made up for it with their culinary expertise so we let it slide...this time.

I'm Really Glad I Don't Live on Panem

That being, as all of you Hunger Games fans know, the fictional, futuristic world where the novel takes place. It is the land which North America will become, and consists of a thriving "Capitol" surrounded by 12 Districts. There were 13, but the Capitol destroyed the 13th to remind the inhabitants of Panem not to rebel lest the same fate befall their homes. The story is told by a teenage girl from District 12, Katniss, a strong female lead who, after her father's death, takes responsibility for her sister and her mother by hunting for food in the forbidden forest which lies outside of District 12's borders. She seems hardened by her clearly difficult life, and unable to relate and connect with anyone else save her hunting partner, a teenage boy named Gale.

The authority figures of this futuristic world do some pretty messed up stuff to keep the residents of the districts in their place and remind them not to rebel. The most messed up thing which also happens to be the plot for this book, is called the Hunger Games. This is a televised event where a boy and a girl between the ages of 12 and 18 from each district are chosen at random in a ceremony called the reaping and are then placed in an outdoor arena and forced to fight to the death. Hm, interesting storyine for a young adult series. Of course, our dear narrator Katniss is the girl representative for her district. The rest of the novel is about her experience in the arena, and the relationship which she forms with the male representative, Peeta (which only makes me think of Greek pita chips whenever I read his name).

I cannot even tell you how many people told me that I "have to read this book" and that once I start, I would finish it within a few days tops. Maybe the fact that people told me that is the reason that I did, indeed, read it from cover to cover in three days. I do not know how to describe it- this book is addicting. I spent hours in the dead of night when I really could have used sleep poring over this book. Suzanne Collins, the author, is a master at storytelling, and the words flow so easily- probably why people tend to finish it quickly. That, and it is extremely enthralling and addictive- it is the heroin of young adult novels.

I was conflicted about a few things in this book, one being Katniss, the main character. I like that she is a strong female lead- teenage girls need that especially if they have read the Twilight series in which the main girl whose name I cannot even remember is as passive as they come. I am not sure if it is a good idea or not that the novel is told from her perspective. This fact along with there being three novels in the series pretty much ensure the audience that Katniss is never really in danger while she is in the Hunger Games. I also am extremely peeved about the way she treats Peeta. I don't want to give anything away, so if anyone has read it we can discuss my thoughts on this later. Despite these small irritants, I really do recommend this book. I am moving on to the second one today.

Shame: My First NC-17 Film

I guess that makes me a big girl now. I was so nervous to see this film that I was almost shaking before it began. But I am absolutely thrilled that I decided to see it despite reviewers stating that it was the most "uncomfortable 100 minutes" of their lives and Roger Ebert saying he would only be able to see it once. Yes, it is about the tragic life of a sex addict in New York and his inability to have any sort of human connection with anyone. That is what made it so incredibly powerful to watch. And knowing that it was going to be graphic going in definitely helped- I thought it was going to much worse than it ended up being.

The superb acting was one of the many things that made this film so exceptional. Michael Fassbender, who most of you would recognize from either Jane Eyre or Haywire truly demonstrated his acting ability as the lead role in Shame. I cannot remember the last time my heart has ached in such a way for a character- you hate him so much for the way he treats his sister (beautifully portrayed by Carey Mulligan) and the way he uses women, but pity him so much for those same reasons. He is simply unable to connect in a normal way with another human being. Yet despite his immense flaws and major mistakes, you still want him to win and overcome his inner demons. His emotions are effortlessly etched in his face, and the audience has no choice but to feel exactly what he feels, and to hurt right along with him. Needless to say, it is an emotional experience to watch this film. I also enjoyed that New York City was not romanticized as it is in so many movies these days. I cannot exactly label myself an expert in NYC knowledge seeing as how I only spent a little over a day there. But I feel as though so many films these days make it out to be a perfect and magical place with no flaws, so I was glad that Shame portrayed the other side of things. The scenery and the cinematography meshed perfectly with the story.

Towards the end, there was one longer scene which was pretty difficult to watch, but aside from that one I did not find it to be any sort of permanently damaging film mentally or anything along those lines. I do not reccommend it to anyone who only likes happy and uplifting films and who cannot bear to see anyone naked. The end of this film was so hopeless and hopeful all at once, something I cannot describe but that would make sense upon viewing it. Watching Shame was really a cinematic experience that I am glad to have had.

Australian Mormons

I know you have all seen those commercials where people from all different walks of life tell us about themselves and how wonderful everything is for them and then let us all know their name and that they are a mormon. Typically, they are all bearable, I'm glad that they are so happy in their lives, but there is one that kind of rubs me the wrong way. It is the one narrated by Sarah, an Australian lady who tells us that she used to have a really amazing career and owned a public relations company, but she decided that it was more important to just be a mom and she traded "walking the red carpet" to "walking the clothes out to hang on the line". What kind of message is this?? It sure wouldn't make me want to be a mormon. It makes it sound like you have to give up your career to be happy in life.

http://mormon.org/sarah/

Europeans and Wet Armpits

My thoughts today have been more spastic than the movements of a squirrel with ADD. I'm sure you all loved that analogy. When I got out of the shower, my eyes were scanning all of the bottles lined up along the bathroom counter and stopped on the miniature bottle of roll-on deodorant which I purchased while I was in England. Buying this product was made necessary after I dropped and broke my normal stick deodorant from the states. Now, I am not sure about the rest of the US citizens out there, but I personally cannot stand roll-on deodorant. After you put it on you have to flap your arms around like a retarded chicken to get it to dry before you can put your clothes on, and if you do not give it the proper amount of drying time, it seeps through your clothes to make it ironically look like a sweat spot.

I have noticed a lot of differences between the US and Europe, but not too many when it comes to cosmetics and toiletries. Both countries have the same/similar shampoos and conditioners, body washes, toothpastes, etc. The inability to find a single deodorant in stick form seems completely outside the realm of reason to me. Why would this product be completely unavailable there? Also, why is it that Europeans like a product which seems so inconvenient? Maybe stick deodorants have just not recieved the proper amount of marketing there. I just cannot stand wet pits. Lovely wording, I know...

And that concludes my random thoughts for the day.