Age Of Ultron Doesn't Live up to Avengers Potential

I just want to kick off my review of The Avengers: Age of Ultron with a question to my readers. Am I the only one who is sick of the whole Russian/Eastern European villain thing? Like, I feel very over it. Let's try to diversify with the villains at this point, filmmakers! I guess some of them have branched out and decided to make those from the Middle East the enemy but still... When will we see the bad-ass villain from Greenland?

There were aspects of the relationships in the movie that simply didn't seem to contribute anything at all to the plot. The odd romantic moments between Marc Ruffalo and Scarlett Johansson were awkward to say the least, and, let's admit it, a pairing that would just never happen in a billion years.

In regards to the plot, it just wasn't as original as I'd hoped it would be. Artificial intelligence trying to take over the world? Hasn't that been done countless times, even recently? Then again, I suppose pretty much everything has been done already at this point.

I'm not going to sit here and point out flaw after flaw. The 2 hour and 21 minutes run time hardly felt long at all, which is really saying something. I was so engaged during the action scenes and the personal interactions amongst the characters that my short attention span didn't really get to me. Even the cheesy one-liners that were a little too corny for my taste didn't bother me. Plus, Thor is really attractive so that in itself made the movie for me.

Yum.

Jared Leto is a Handsome, Pretty Man

How is it fair that Jared Leto has the ability to be both a really hot guy and a gorgeous woman? It's not fair, that's what I say. For me, one of the most striking aspects about his role in Dallas Buyer's Club that earned him the coveted Oscar for best supporting actor was how pretty he was. Perhaps the reason I find him so attractive is because he looks like he could be the brother of my female celeb crush, Zooey Deschanel (maybe it is the blue eyes?).

Sexy man

Pretty convincing lady...

Jared Leto could be her brother

So, Dallas Buyer's Club was a good movie. Wow, nice generic statement there, Marisa. Was I blown away by this movie? No. Would I watch it over and over again like I would Lost In Translation? No again. But would I recommend it? Absolutely, one thousand times over. Right from the start, the film sucked me in and held my attention hostage with a vice grip the entire running time. The plot chronicles the true story about Ron Woodruff, a Texas bull rider and electrician during his life after he is diagnosed with HIV and refuses to give up despite the doctor giving him 30 days to live. In Mexico, he obtains substances that seem to alleviate his symptoms and decides to help others with HIV and AIDS by selling them in Dallas. While in the hospital in Dallas, he meets a transvestite, Rayon (actually, he is pro-op- does that just make him a cross-dresser? I'm not an expert on the terminology) who helps him in his distribution.This angers the FDA and healthcare officials who believe he is interfering with their trial of the drug AZT by drawing away its participants.

I can't imagine how starving Matthew McConaughey must have been the whole time he sacrificed his sexy toned body to waste away to an emaciated state in preparation to play Rob Woodruff. His physical transformation along with his passionate acting earned him that Oscar for best actor, although I heard Chiwetel Ejiofor from 12 Years a Slave was equally impressive, if not more so. I can't say yet because I have not seen it. One thing I noticed is I don't think I have ever seen McConaughey play a role in which he did not use his natural Southern accent. That is what I want to see. Jared Leto was fantastic and passionate and had to starve himself so he deserved his Oscar as well.

Dallas Buyer's Club was a lot more graphic and intense than I assumed it would be. I did not even know it was rated R until the theater employee asked to check my ID to ensure that I was at least 17. I was THIS close (holds thumb and pointer fingers really close together) to mentally giving him kudos for making me feel young again but then I instantly retracted these thoughts when he saw my birth date and said, wide-eyed, "wow, you're a LOT older than me!". I guess no wise sage has taught him how to talk to women yet. Basically, if you are very sensitive to pervasive language and somewhat graphic sex scenes (although after The Wolf of Wall Street I am numbed to that and offer an altered perspective) and if you work for the FDA (this movie makes them look moronic) you may want to skip it. 

Hustle Me, Batman

I like being hustled as long as it is by an overweight Christian Bale (a.k.a Batman, if you didn't get the title reference) with an atrocious combover and a particularly foxy-looking Amy Adams. American Hustle's nomination for best picture was a head-scratcher for me, but if Jennifer Lawrence hadn't been nominated for best supporting actress I would have sat there ripping my hair out and stomping around like a four-year-old throwing a massive tantrum. Though she appeared a bit too youthful to play the part of the disgruntled and manipulative housewife and mother, she pulled it off perfectly, making audiences (or at least me) want rip my way though the silver screen and slug her in the face to prevent any future misery caused by her selfishness and ignorance.

The acting was more stellar than the Big Dipper and the little one combined. Amy Adams, who I truly don't understand how she has to much time to dedicate to such a wide variety of films, did a great job and, male viewers will be pleased to know, didn't wear much the entire running time. Bradley Cooper has come a long way since his days in The Hangover (actually, he just recently participated in a horrendous third installment in the series, but at least the quality films in which he is acting simultaneously partially make up for that atrocity). If he hadn't already proven his on-screen skills in Silver Lining's Playbook, his appearance in American Hustle would have.

Ick- she just look likes a catty b****

Quick plot summary: Irving Rosenfeld (Bale) and his main squeeze Sydney Prosser (Adams) spend their time conning the desperate with various schemes until FBI agent Richie DiMaso catches them and forces them to help him catch a corrupt politician in exchange for DiMasso not to press charges. Their highly sensitive operation is going swimmingly until Rosenfeld's nosy and obnoxious wife (Lawrence) threatens to expose the whole thing with her unintentional involvement. As previously mentioned, the wife is just awful in every way. She accidentally sets the house on fire multiple times, is a negligent mother, and threatens Rosenfeld whenever he mentions the divorce he and Prosser desperately want. Thus, she is the most entertaining character by a long shot.

Wow, Christian- you really let yourself go...

For me, the take away of this movie is that the acting is beyond superb (super superb?), it makes you wish you lived in New York in the 60s, and the plot keeps you entertained as long as you can actually follow it. The complexities in the plot in which important twists and turns happen at break neck speeds reminded me of Tinker, Tailer, Soldier, Spy. That movie just flew right over my head, despite my desperate attempts to understand the details. Yes, the actors nominated for their roles in American Hustle deserved their nominations. Especially Christian Bale just for sporting that horrific comb-over and gaining so much weight (the weight gain seemed to work for Charleze Theron in Monster). I do hope, however, that it does not take home the Best Picture prize. I have yet to be impressed by a nominated film to feel it is deserving.

I Prefer Captain Jack Sparrow...

Modern-day pirates are a whole other animal in comparison to Disney's jovial, somewhat clumsy, lady chasing miscreants represented in the Pirates of the Caribbean Ride at Disneyland. A desire to pursue a life of adventure and treasure motivated these whimsical pirates of old. Not so in the case of the Somalian pirates that took Captain Richard Phillips hostage. In response to his character's insisting that there must be other options for his captors to make money other than piracy and kidnapping, one of them flashes him a piercing stare and says simply "maybe in America." This jarring reality highlights the atrocious human rights situations in countries all over the world leading so many to tread down the desperate path of crime with the hopes of appeasing murderous "bosses" back home. These pirates aren't singing songs of "really bad eggs" and "yo ho, yo ho, a pirate's life for me." For them, a pirate's life is nothing to get lyrical about.

These guys mean business...

This guy's in it for the fun

After hearing varying stories quoting the real life crew of the attacked ship as saying Hank's portrayal of Captain Phillips as a hero was entirely inaccurate, I took his actions in the film with a grain of salt. According to the crew members who have come forth with their version of the true events that transpired, Phillips was a surly and over-confident captain. Whereas in the film he acted heroically in attempting to sacrifice his life so the pirates wouldn't shoot a crew member, this allegedly never occurred. Official reports stated that Phillips received and consequently ignored warning upon warning of pirate activity in his ship's area. Read more about the controversy here. Maybe this is heresy. Maybe Phillips really was a valiant survivor able to stay calm in dire scenarios. Whatever. I was not there. Flaws in accuracy aside, Captain Phillips presents a harrowing and captivating tale of survival at sea. 

Though the ending felt prolonged, there was no shortage of nail-biting tension coupled with scenes of non-stop action and thrill. It's funny how brutal we are to our own bodies while watching movies like this- we dig our nails into our palms, clench our jaws, pull on our hair... oh the joyous physical reactions to anxiety. This anxiety never seems to cease as we follow the true events of Captain Richard Phillips and his crew as their ship, the Maersk Alabama, is attacked by Somali pirates in 2009. Once again, how much of it is true I don't know, and I'm not too sure it matters. In the film, the pirates overtake their ship and eventually kidnap its captain, played of course by Tom Hanks, for ransom.

The authenticity of the use of Somali natives (some of whom, I heard, had no prior acting experience and came from Minnesota where there is a thriving Somali population) speaking their native tongue proved a winning choice by director Tom Greengrass (haha, what a fantastic last name! The grass is always greener...). The Somalian actors truly did a phenomenal job. They forced audiences to pity them for the sheer desperation leading them down such a horrendous path in life while simultaneously feeling  dread stemming from their cold-blooded, heartless actions. They could have easily lost all humanity while playing these roles, yet kept it, though often at bay, in their expressions. 

Honestly, I don't feel that Captain Phillips possessed the "wow" factor earning it the Best Picture Oscar. When I saw Argo, I knew it should win. When I saw Little Miss Sunshine and The King's Speech, the choices were blatantly obvious- there could be no other films crowned the winners of their prospective years. So far out of the 2013 nominees, I have seen Captain Phillips, Her, Gravity, American Hustle, The Wolf of Wall Street and Nebraska. I am still waiting for the obvious nominee to come out of the woodwork. 

Sorry, Siri...

...but I'd rather date a human being. However, running off with your laptop is presented as ever-so-plausible in the futuristic world (the not-too-distant future, terrifyingly enough) presented in Her. Informing friends and family that your significant other is an operating system doesn't even earn a second thought. Theodore, played by Joaquin Pheonix, wanders around in a depressed stupor (he even requests that his do-it-all phone/earpiece thing play a "melancholy song" while he rides in an elevator) completely entranced by his ear gadget (the future of smart phones, apparently- I thought it was the Google contact lens), telling it to check his e-mail, read messages, etc. None of the people passing him by glance up, completely absorbed in their technological devices. Doesn't sound too far off from where society is today, does it?

The portrayal of human-robot relations in film is no novel idea. There's Hal in 2001: A Space Odyssey, that weird robot from the Will Smith movie that came out awhile back, and now we have Samantha. I guess you could call her "sexy"- how could she not be when the sultry Scarlett Johansson is providing her voice (though I must admit, I preferred our darling Scarlett when looking like she did in Lost in Translation, aka her pre-smoldering temptress days)? Perhaps that casting choice was actually a flaw- every time Samantha spoke my mind instantly imagined Scarlett on the other end of the phone somewhere, making it seem more like Theodore was involved in a long-distance relationship.

I noticed that Joaquin Phoenix is the perfect Doppleganger of the guy in the Cohen Brothers' film A Serious Man (Michael Stuhlbarg). The first time I saw the trailer, I did not think that the main actor was Joaquin. Just another pair to add to the list of celebrity look-a-likes (think Katy Perry and Zooey Deschanel). Joaquin did a stellar acting job as did Amy Adams (how does she have time to be in so many movies these days?) and Chris Pratt (that guy is hilarious- probably the most underrated comedy actor of today. I attest he is the next Will Farrell).

Maybe it is the glasses?

Noticing that this film received over a 90% on Rotten Tomatoes and its Best Picture nomination instantly elevated the bar of my expectations to the point where the heaviest man on earth could do the limbo underneath it. This is dangerous to do prior to a screening as I am almost always disappointed. This was no exception- I wanted nothing short of to love Her with a fiery, unbridled passion causing me to burst out the theater doors and rave about its awesomeness non-stop to all I encountered for the next two weeks, much to the dismay of all I encountered. Is that too much to ask? I didn't think so.

Being a contender for the coveted Best Picture Oscar instantly sets my mind to "over-analyze every film element" mode. I assume that if the Academy sees it as a true masterpiece of the cinema, it must have subtleties that film students could spend hours discussing. It got to the point where I thought "boy, they sure use the colors red and pink a lot. That MUST stand for something...hmmm...". Yeah, it probably stands for absolutely nothing. I also begin to read far too much into the underlying message of the film. Is it a critique of our increasing dependence on technology? An insight into the future dating world (match.com for robots?)? A commentary on how operating systems need to be treated better? All of the above? The takeaway from this review is I perhaps expected a bit too much and was therefore let down. Just be aware that it is a bit slow- if you go to see it, try to enjoy and not dissect every scene presented before you like I did. Then, you will certainly enjoy it. 

Ron Burgundy is Back!

Ron Burgundy and his news team back in action is a welcome premise- it's been so long since filmgoers last enjoyed their crazy, often politically-incorrect antics. Yes, Ron Burgandy is looking a bit aged in this second installment of the Anchorman films, but that may have been more prominent in my mind as I recently watched Elf, starring a much younger Will Farrell as its protagonist. Christina Applegate also looked a lot older albeit just as attractive as always.

I enjoyed the second part of Anchorman about as much as I expected to. When I read that its running time pans over a length of two hours, I felt that this was a bit excessive to say the least for that type of goofy, crass comedy. Turns out I was right- a good 20-30 minutes could have easily been shaved off with a 5-blade cinematic razor with no damage done to the plot. It could have easily gone without an entire, draggy and not-funny sub-plot about Ron, his wife and son raising a great white shark named Dobby (there is even a ridiculously unnecessary musical number pertaining to this storyline). 

Anyone who enjoyed the first film will, at least to some degree, enjoy the second. There is nothing particularly noteworthy or fantastic about this addition, but I did find myself laughing out loud at certain jokes and I appreciated the plot revolving around how news first became sensationalist and not really about the news. I thought it was creative to pinpoint the moment journalism stopped being about the news on the actions of Ron and his compadres. There are crude jokes, racist jokes, and some jokes that went right over my head. This movie provides that which it is expected to provide- a nice, lighthearted escape from the seriousness of our everyday lives. 

Some people really should not get perms...

Still Confused About Time

About Time entertained me more than most of the films I have seen in theaters recently, so before I list the negative aspects which will undoubtedly appear to negate that previous statement, I'll hammer out the good stuff. Maybe that is backwards logic, however; that would be like starting dinner with your favorite food and ending it with your least. I don't want to leave a lingering, nasty sentiment on your mental taste bds, but I am going to try it this way anyhow. It's my blog, not yours. Sorry, that was a very rude digital comment.

The filmmakers and authors out there selecting time travel as a topic need to sit down at a conference table (or at a long table at a coffee shop, since they seem to frequent those), pass around some donuts and coffee, and make some concrete decisions about the technicalities concerning venturing backwards, forwards, upside down and any other theoretical movement through time. As a reader/moviegoer, attempting to keep all of the rules and regs their exceptions straight does nothing short of give me a throbbing headache. I don't like popping Advil mid-movie. Right when you think you know the technicalities like the back of your hand, they throw you an illogical curve ball. I like a curve ball if it will win the World Series for my home team, but not right when time travel starts to make sense.

When the father (who is never named, but fabulously portrayed by Bill Nighy) in About Time informs his son Tim (played by one Domhnall Gleeson, aka Charlie Weasley in Harry Potter) that the men, and only the men, can travel backwards, and only backwards, in time, I nodded and jotted these two rules in my mental notepad. I felt that was easy enough to follow.

Then, my whole mental note was brutally ripped to shreds by the evil screenwriter when every time the son travels back in time, he later travels forward to get back to the original moment from which he traveled. What is this? Some kind of confusing exception? Was I supposed to simply forget about the aforementioned conversation where it was explicitly stated that, while backwards time travel is entirely acceptable, forward time travel defies the laws of physics? It wouldn't have been as bad if this forward traveling occurred only once- maybe the son discovered a rip in time-space allowing him to do so. As if these multiple occurrences weren't enough of a head-scratcher on their own, imagine how I felt when explicitly-stated rule number two, that only men can travel in time, was broken as well.

Ok, so here was the takeaway regarding time travel rules by the end credits: the members of Tim's family with a Y chromosome can travel back in time unless they are holding hands with a female in their family (or is it any female? That was never clarified). They can never travel forwards in time unless it is to a place from which they already traveled back. These two rules and rule exceptions alone caused so many questions to creep up for me. I would list many more confusing rules that came about, but it would mean listing spoilers and I know how panties-in-a-knot people can get about those.

I will end on a positive note after all, the note of D flat. There's a little musical notation humor for you. But seriously, About Time leaves its viewers with a beautifully positive message to mull over. There is one particularly touching moment in the film, the kind that makes sensitive individuals reaching for the packet of tissues that may or may not exist in their pocket or purse or at least lift their shirt sleeve to their watery eyes. Tim's father doles out a touching piece of advice to his son. He tells him to use his gift of time travel to live each day twice: the first time, he instructs him to live the day complete with the stresses on which we normally dwell, and the second to go back to the start of that same day and only notice the little beauties which we typically overlook. What a nice piece of advice. I'm still confused about time travel, though...

I guess they also have to put on their best constipated face when they travel in time

Enough to Say About Enough Said

Rotten Tomatoes let me down like a bad friend the other day when I trusted its 95% review of Enough Said to the point I was willing to drop $8.75 (the "discounted" matinee price) to see it in theaters. I suppose Rotten Tomatoes cannot be solely blamed for the over-rating of this film. I let my guard down and raised my expectations which, in retrospect, was a grave error on my part. I should continue to expect the worst of the worst as I have previously- a tactic which allows the complete evasion of disappointment.

Okay, okay- maybe I am getting a wee bit dramatic (like a 15-year-old girl whose mother just forbade her from going to prom with high school senior jock Shane Jackson after she discovered that he got busted with pot at the last football game). There were redeeming factors sprinkled among the array of average cinematic elements. My already well-established lady crush on Julia Louis-Dreyfus (is she related to Richard Dreyfus? Or is his spelled Dreyfuss? I could look it up but I am too lazy to bring my hand all the way to the search bar in the upper right corner) somehow managed to grow more than I thought possible. Her perfect portrayal of Elaine alone in Seinfeld was reason enough to watch every episode of that show. Something about her charming, over-zealous smile, quirky sense of humor and radiation of self-confidence is immensely endearing- characteristics that she carried over well from the role of Elaine to the role of Eva in Enough Said. Okay, lesbian moment over. Sorry about that, guys.

How could you not fall in love with this quirky, sexy lady??

Quick plot summary: Eva (Louis-Dreyfus) is a divorced, self-employed masseuse with clients ranging from elderly men with bad breath overly excited during her massages to chatty-Cathy Momzillas who never shut up about their children and social lives. One evening, she accompanies her Australian therapist friend (Toni Collette-actually, her character might be English in this movie) and her husband to a party where she meets a new client, Marianne (Catherine Keener) and a man named Albert (James Gandolfini) with whom she briefly converses about how they both have daughters about to head to college and both find no one at the party attractive (though clearly, Albert wants Eva as he asks Australian therapist's husband for her digits later. Whatever, I'm getting nitpicky). Anyway, he calls Eva and she agrees to go out with him even though he is a bit "flabby" and not attractive in the "traditional sort of way" (in other words, he has a beer belly and a receding hairline). She takes awhile to warm up to him, but their first date is enjoyable for them and enjoyable to watch as well- I found myself awkwardly laughing out loud during those scenes (but at least I was in good company and not laughing alone to the distaste of the rest of the audience). The conversations between Eva and Albert during the first half or so of the movie are immensely entertaining and one of the best saving graces of the film.

Eventually, as their relationship progresses, so does Eva's relationship with the client she met at the same party at which she met Albert. The two ladies begin discussing the fluffy topics that ladies typically discuss- their former marriages, their current relationships, their daughters and jobs. Most notably, Marianne rambles about how awful her ex-husband is. This may be a spoiler, but I'm pretty sure they give it away in the trailer so I'm just going to say it: Eva's female client ends up being Albert's ex-wife. Plot twist! Didn't see that coming! Eva doesn't know what to do since she allegedly values both relationships and also wants to find out more about Albert's shortcomings although in doing so, she simply poisons her own mind against him. Do they end up together? Do they not? I won't give that away because then there really wouldn't be a point in seeing it even when it comes out on Netflix.

Much to my displeasure, the writers interwove a strange, unfinished plot thread through the tapestry of the main events of the film, and the fact that they left it hanging irritated me just as an actual thread hanging off a tapestry (or off a shirt- that is a more realistic scenario) would. Chloe (Tavi Gevinson, who looks exactly like a young Michelle Williams), the friend of Eva's daughter Ellen (Tracey Fairaway) has some mommy issues and therefore spends all of her time trying to bond with Eva, much to Ellen's displeasure. However, every time Eva attempts to remedy this situation with her daughter by spending more time with her, Ellen just broods and holds a grudge like your typical 18-year-old would and doesn't even make an effort. Eventually, Chloe's mom gets mad at Eva for "stealing her daughter" and then we never see either of them again and the writers leave it at that. Does Chloe ever end up with a better home situation? Does she make up with Ellen for "stealing her mother"? Who knows? I hate loose ends.

No resolution for their relationship...

Speaking of the younger characters in the movie, when Eva and Albert's relationship begins to blossom substantially, he introduces her to his 18-year-old daughter Tess (Eve Hewson). Tess is horrendously, irritatingly snobby, a personality which I see as completely unnecessary. I suppose it is to show the effect that her parent's divorce had on her personality, but all she did was bother me and make me want to slap her hard in the face. Her presence in the film is necessary, however; she acts as a McGuffin (some film class knowledge rearing its head there) which is a means of driving the plot forward.

Despite its flaws, on which I perhaps focused too much attention, Enough Said is worth seeing once it comes out, but perhaps not the overly-generous 95% rating from Rotten Tomatoes. Maybe I will think twice before trusting that site again.