The Third Hobbit and the End of an Era

I am about to wax emotional in this post about The Hobbit, The Battle of the Five Armies. So, be prepared with your Lactaid so you can handle all of the cheesiness.

I realised as I entered the theatre on opening day that it signified the end of an era. It would be the last Lord of the Rings or Hobbit movie premiere that I would ever attend. This made me feel even more grateful to be there. 

I remember distinctly my first experience seeing a film about the wonderful world of Tolkien’s Middle Earth. I was only 11 at the time, and had not been introduced to the books yet. I knew nothing of Orcs or Hobbits, and I had never heard of Gandalf the Grey. My world was about to be turned upside down.

Pick me, pick me!

One day in Chicago, my father suggested we see The Fellowship of the Ring. When my young self discovered the PG-13 rating, I became afraid. At that time, just about any movie monster could potentially give me nightmares for weeks at a time. Actually, not much has changed as far as that goes.

However, my father insisted that it was nothing I couldn't handle, so I agreed to go, though with some reluctance. The instant I beheld Tolkien’s magical world and became acquainted with its inhabitants, I never wanted to be anywhere else.

For every subsequent film, I was there on opening day, sometimes dressed like a creature from Tolkien’s wonderful world. I read the books from cover to cover and loved every second I spent traveling through Middle Earth with all of its inhabitants. I became obsessed to say the least with the films, memorising every line and seeing them many times in theatres.

Peter Jackson has quite the talent for making me cry. No matter how many times I watch The Fellowship of the Ring, I always tear up at the end when Boromir gives his last to save Merry and Pippin. Emotions well up inside me when Sam gives his speech about the fight between good over evil. When Aragorn gives his speech to motivate the troops in the second film, I want to burst through the screen and fight Sauron’s minions myself.

Hold on, let me just get my tissues...

In the last instalment of The Hobbit trilogy, I felt tears welling up behind my eyes at least three separate times. Honestly, it wasn't my favourite of the six Peter Jackson films, but it succeeded in captivating my attention for the entire running time. It was appealing visually, it was emotional, had plenty of action (and of course, some over the top battles featuring Legolas doing badass elf things), and a perfect ending. Martin Freeman was perfect as Bilbo, as usual. 

The songs in the credits of Jackson's films are generally quite impressive, but unfortunately Ed Sheeran, the best singer in the entire world, already sang for the last one so I knew that nothing could top it. I was right of course, but I enjoyed hearing Billy Boyd's (the actor who played Pippin) song nonetheless.

The Japanese teacher who accompanied me to my final Lord of the Rings premiere summarised the film better than I ever could. He said “to me, it is about love, friendship and fight for good.” Well said, sir, well said. I will hold these messages in my heart.

And so, as Gandalf sings, "the road goes ever on and on, back to the door where it began." 

Run from the Fire, Bilbo!

What a wonderful world J.R.R. Tolkein concocted for all of us to enjoy. L. Frank Baum's lions, tigers and bears don't even compare to Tolkein's hobbits, elves and orcs. Whether it be via the pages of The Hobbit or the his other literary works or reflected on the silver screen thanks to the imagination of Peter Jackson and everyone else contributing to the films, his creations have already enriched my life immensely. I will never forget when I first laid eyes on an orc on the big screen in Chicago, against my will, twelve years ago. I am so glad I did.

I'm not sure how to sort all my jumbled thoughts about the second installment of the three Hobbit films. Starting with Bilbo's entourage, the dwarves journeying to The Lonely Mountain, feels appropriate. I wish that Thorin Oakenshield, the leader of the vertically-challenged bunch, were a more likable little guy- his cocky attitude paired with his tiny stature make it difficult to take him seriously. My reaction when things go wrong for him isn't to feel pity, but rather to point and laugh in his face. The other dwarves make up for this, however, but I can't help marveling at the lack of consistency among their appearances. It seems like Jackson stole a page from Walt Disney's notes when he made Snow White and the Seven Dwarves. Some of the dwarves look completely cartoonish with bulbous noses and hairdos that would be more appropriate in Who-Ville whereas others look completely normal save their short statures (example, the sexy Fili). The dwarves are undoubtedly a lot of fun to adventure with, even if it is from the comfort of a movie theater seat (though we all know how "comfortable" those really are now-a-days...). I most enjoyed the oh-so-famous scene where they escape from their captivity among the elves by riding in barrels down a raging river chased simultaneously by orcs with metal jutting out of various parts of their bodes and elves that get really pissed when their captives escape (and I thought white water rafting was intense...).

Generally, two dimensions are plenty for me when I go to see a movie. Therefore, I expected to be completely unimpressed by my 3D screening of The Hobbit: Desolation of Smaug. I get freaked out enough when things jump out at me in 2D, on a flat surface- things literally jumping OUT AT me in 3D put me on the verge of a heart attack. You can imagine my relief (or can you?) when Peter Jackson, generally the king of overdoing things, went more subtle on the 3D front. Yes, yes, he "threw an orc head" at us on one occasion, but other than that left the gimmicky stuff to a minimum- a giant bee "coming right at you," etc. etc.

My favorite characters, hands-down, are Gandalf and Bilbo. Strangely, the star hobbit of The Lord of the Rings films, Frodo, pissed me off to no end. He was such a wuss and always causing trouble for everyone else. I bet Gandalf instantly regretted the choice of entrusting the ring to such a little cry-baby. Yet it makes sense that he would, after seeing how incredibly brave of a hobbit Bilbo was. He must have figured due to their sharing some DNA, Frodo would be just as brave. Well, we all know that one trait that did not make it through to future generations. Back to the point: Martin Freeman completely aces his portrayal of Bilbo. He is lovable, you root for him, he beautifully demonstrates his changing character after discovering the ring... spot on with the casting there. As for Gandalf... well I have loved Ian McKellen from the moment I set eyes on him as Gandalf the Gray all those years ago. Watching him get beat up by Sauron and his minions in this film is worse than watching an adorable puppy get kicked in the snout.

I'm sure you are all just dying to know about the oh-so-mysterious dragon, Smaug, and whether or not Peter Jackson got his appearance "correct." I mean, how hard it is to make a CGI dragon look big and terrifying? Better than his looks was his voice- one that is becoming more and more familiar- that of Benedict Cumberbatch. I guess he decided between acting in the Sherlock series and playing Khan in Star Trek among many other films, he figured "hey, why not do the voice of one of the most famous dragons ever written about? I've got time for that." Well, I'm glad he decided to, and you'll see why.

The film was truly fantastic. A little long, but no surprise there. Ed Sheeran singing the song during the closing credits was the icing on top of my beautiful Hobbit cake. I am madly in love with that sexy, British redhead singer so it was, to say the least, a pleasant surprise to hear his silky, sultry voice singing about the plight of the dwarves. Even if just to hear that song... go see The Hobbit: Desolation of Smaug. Oh, and don't worry ladies, Orlando is looking just as sexy in this film. 

Alright, this Journey is a Little Expected...

Who in their right mind goes into a movie adapted from only a fraction of a novel which is not of considerable length and expects it to move at a rapid pace? Only certifiably insane people, if you ask me. I certainly do not see a point cinematically to dividing The Hobbit into two parts let alone three (we all see the financial point, however). The only literature adapted to the big screen currently in theaters which desperately needs division into multiple films at the moment is Anna Karenina. In that case, we're dealing with a 735-page Russian novel. Perhaps division could have saved that train wreck of a film (for those of you who have read the book or seen the movie, no pun intended).

Back to the topic at hand- The Hobbit. Before stepping into the theater I was under the impression that it was "only" going to be two films, and I still had the common sense to mentally prep myself as best as possibly for the long haul. At 169 minutes, The Hobbit part one certainly is trying at times. I would advise anyone with concentration issues, diagnosed or otherwise, to really gear up or take some meds or to hook up to an IV of caffeine before the screening.

I read a multitude of reviews on good ol' Rotten Tomatoes before attending the midnight premiere. Every critic who "blasted" the film referenced the same negative aspect- the draggy nature of the begining. Yes, it was probably a little bit worse than watching molasses slowly trickle down a slope at a 1 degree angle for the first 45 minutes to an hour. But my dedication to the Lord of the Rings films and the talented acting right from the get-go of Martin Freeman as young Bilbo had me holding out hope. And I'm glad I did. Once the ball gets rolling, The Hobbit is a truly charming film. I'm talking chivilrous, European gentleman caller charming. Considering it is the most lighthearted of Tolkein's books, the film took a surprisingly dark twist as well. Yet the generous sprinkling of humor throughout the plot more than made up for it.

My favorite scene, and I don't believe I'm alone in this, was the famous riddle exchange between Bilbo and Gollum. Mainly, perhaps, because of the talented Martin Freeman and Andy Serkis (disguised by CGI). Other moments captivated me as well such as the familiar, touching exchanges between characters reminiscent of those in the Lord of the Rings trilogy. When Bilbo is acknowledged for his immense bravery with violins swelling in the background it tugs at my heart strings more than a sad puppy's eyes looking up at me from a cage in the pound. And one undeniable truth is that whether you are bored or not, the scenery alone provides plenty of eye candy and makes you want to travel to New Zealand all over again.