The Battle Between Tights and Compression Socks

So, previously I wrote a blog expressing my “undying” love for pantyhose and their near-required nature in Japanese society. Well, that love has officially died, and I retract every positive statement I ever made about the evil, restrictive items of poorly-made clothing except for how nice they make my legs look. Since Japanese women tend to be completely fine with suffering to look attractive, it makes perfect sense that they would opt for complete discomfort in exchange for sexy legs . So, within the first week, I spent about $8.00 on two pairs of pantyhose under the misplaced assumption that they would last a long time. False. After about one week, my nail got caught in the flimsy, good-for-nothing material of one pair and ripped a gigantic hole in it. Great. Four dollars down the drain.

NOOOOO

 Aside from their complete lack of longevity, pantyhose are uncomfortable, ride up your bum, make your legs sweat uncontrollably, and take about 20 minutes to put on. If you try to pull them up in haste, they rip and you are out the four bucks.

This list on BuzzFeed of the 28 Reason Tights are the Worst came about at the perfect time to supplement my rant. One of my favorites is number 12. Yes, you can opt to buy the horrible, cheap tights, but those rip even faster than their expensive counterparts. Occasionally, I have accidentally ripped them just taking them out of the packaging. Maybe if they didn't rip, Bill Murry wouldn't have endured this awkward encounter:

On a more positive note, I have discovered the magical, wonderful alter-ego of pantyhose: compression socks. Compression socks are amazing; a statement which I hope not to have to retract later. They improve circulation in your legs, making working out substantially better. As opposed to dreaded pantyhose, compression stockings are useful in all situations. Traveling by plane? These bad boys will keep the blood flowing in your legs and possibly prevent blood clots. Going to the gym or for a run outside? They will keep your legs supported. Just hanging out? They make your legs look rocking under most outerwear, or like a sexy schoolgirl in a skirt. Which would be a bit creepy for me since I'm a teacher so perhaps not the best option for me. But if you are into that kind of thing, it's your life. Apparently compression socks help you sleep better too, but I cannot confirm that with my own experience yet. Look for that in part two. Not really, actually; that would make for a very boring blog. 

So, who wins the battle? Compression socks, obviously. There was never much going for the tights side anyways except for sheer vanity. There's a nice little play on words for you guys. Sheer vanity. Get it? Because tights are sheer. Okay, I need to stop right there.