Highschool Has an Odd Idea of the Real World

Well, as an individual who officially holds a job in what highschool teachers would refer to as the "real" world, I can tell you that their constant assurances that everything we did in class was in preparation to live in it were not so accurate after all. I know you are all shocked, but it's true. Although, I am getting rather confused by the notion of the fact that we did not live in the real world before and during high school. What kind of world was it? A world like in Super Mario where clouds attack you and cannons shoot you onto islands in the sky? Or some kind of crazy, alternate, Matrix-esque world?

Whatever kind it was, this "real" one does not consist of one-page resumes, which completely threw me for a loop. Do highschool teachers realize how limiting putting a one-page restriction on resumes is? Yet, throughout my life ever since the introduction of the resume and how to write one in class, I was instructed that it could not, under any circumstances, exceed one page. How, however, as someone interviewing candidates for positions, I find that basically every single one of them has a resume longer than one page. Highschool teachers... you led me astray! I CAN go overboard and add every single job I have ever had to it! I CAN list every skill even ones that seem irrelevant!

So, I am not sure what world my highschool resume-writing knowledge prepared me for. Maybe it is one in Mario that has yet to be released- the one where Mario is attacked by one-page resumes! Save us all!