Okay, this first story about my trip to India is a mundane little anecdote, but it kicked off my first flight by setting me in an irritated mood. So, I picked window seats for both legs of this trip (do trips have other appendages too?) because being stuck in the middle seat of the middle row on a 14 hour trip sounds like my idea of what Hell. So for Denver to Newark, my seat assignment was 24A, and from Newark to Delhi it is 26A. I mixed them up in my head so I got all snug in 26A only to be disturbed about 10 minutes later by a little gnat of a woman telling me that I was in HER seat. I may be imagining this, but she even stuck out her hip and raised an eyebrow upon sharing this gem of information with me.
The thing that really rubbed me the wrong way about this whole situation was that we were BOTH traveling alone, so who the hell cares who sits in 24A and who sits in 26A? It would be a completely different scenario if it were a mother trying to sit with her child or something. The next thing that angered me was that me designated seat, 24A, which was her option since I accidentally stole her seat, is CLOSER to the door anyway!
I am trying to have a positive attitude about this upcoming 14-hour flight. It is inevitable, so I may as well try and enjoy it, so I am looking at it this way: they have about 10 movies available that I yearned to see in theaters but did not get a chance to. Heck, I just got done watching August: Osage Country (I have not figured out how to use italics on the iPad, sorry grammar police) and will have the opportunity to watch about 5 more movies for the low, low price of... oh yeah, my plane ticket. But I will also get free wine, and that cannot hurt (wow, I wanted to write "cant" so badly there...dang keyboard...).
Though they did not even offer peanuts, I am pretty happy about United offering free movies on flights under four hours. Most airlines do not do that anymore. I mean, what the heck do those other companies expect their passengers to do? Read a book? WHATT? United also has Grammar Girl available to listen to! Awesome! Well, for grammar nerds like me anyhow. One other thing I like about United is their safety video. Basically, the over-enthusiastic narrator should just point out that we are all screwed if we go down. For every scenario, it should play out like this: "In the event of a water landing, chances you will make it are slim to none" or "in the event of any other kind of landing, you will most likely be incinerated by the fire and possible explosion caused by the crash." Wow, looks like my positive attitude has dissipated there... sorry, I will try and rekindle it.
I did enjoy the expressions on the faces of the actors in that video. The girl showing us how to put on our life jackets in the event of the water landing in which we would likely perish had a huge grin on her face implying she was about to go on another hot date with the promising man she met on Match.com. Yeah, not the best acting job. If she knew she was about to plunge into the icy ocean and get devoured by sharks, I think her expression would be a bit different. Unless she just popped some anti-anxiety meds.
See? All of this fantastic free time has enabled me to do so much already, and it has only been about two hours. Just imagine the long, ranting blogs that will await you after my flight to Delhi! The pics below: Denver sky, New York, and the barely visible Statue of Liberty.
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